Mixed Disc #3: The Dysfunctional Family Album

Ahh...Christmas! For many, the holidays generally mean taking a break from it all and spending quality time with family. A wonderful concept...in theory!...but it doesn't always go as planned. Sometimes, drunk Uncle Billy loses the $8,000 you need to keep your business afloat (although, on rare occasions, he remembers what he did with the money!). It was the wonderful Saturday Night Live skit from 1990 titled "A Dysfunctional Family Christmas" that was the inspiration for the next mixed CD I sent to Chelo in 2001.

The Dysfunctional
Family Album...12/2001
front cover

The Dysfunctional Family Album is one of my favorite mixed CDs. Chelo received it just in time for our first Christmas together. I don't know what I was thinking sending a collection that early saying, "Dysfunction...there's something I'm familiar with...perhaps you want in?"  Somehow, she saw through the unintended message and married me anyway.

It's not just the collection of songs that makes this disc one of my favorites. I'm really pleased with the artwork, as well. Created to look like a doctored, trashy photo album, The Dysfunctional Family Album contains 24 tracks leaning toward the edgier side of things...both in topic and content. There are songs about divorce, sex changes, deadbeat dads, impish offspring, substance abuse, and good ol' bad genetics. You can see for yourself in the "table of contents".

"table of contents"
click to enlarge

As always, click on the song titles from the tracklist below to see the video, if available. Highlights include live Social Distortion, rare Pearl Jam rehearsal footage, Jewel's mystifying vocal transitions taking her from Jennifer Tilly to Kermit the Frog in one sentence, the incredible stage performance of Tom Waits, Danny Elfman's devilish smile during Oingo Boingo's last song of their very last show, and "That Woman's Got Me Drinking" starring and directed by Johnny Depp. While you're here, suggest some other songs that would fit the theme. What would you put on the sequel?

click to enlarge back cover

1. Now I'm Your Mom<><>David Byrne
2. We're A Happy Family<><>The Ramones
3. Your Auntie Grizelda<><>The Monkees
4. Mother's Little Helper<><>The Rolling Stones
5. Son Of Sam<><>Elliott Smith
6. Ma And Pa<><>Fishbone
7. Mommy's Little Monster<><>Social Distortion
8. Father Of Mine<><>Everclear
9. I'm A Long Gone Daddy<><>The The
10. Had A Dad<><>Jane's Addiction
11. That Woman's Got Me Drinking<><>Shane MacGowan
12. Divorce Song<><>Liz Phair
13. Daughter Of Darkness<><>Tom Jones
14. Problem Child<><>The Damned
15. Just Like My Father<><>Violent Femmes
16. Cemetery Polka<><>Tom Waits
17. Uncle Anesthesia<><>Screaming Trees
18. (Sister) Anne<><>Flop
19. Mother Mother<><>Tracy Bonham
20. Daughter<><>Pearl Jam
21. Gigolo Aunt<><>Syd Barrett
22. Little Sister<><>Jewel
23. Mother<><>The Police
24. Only A Lad<><>Oingo Boingo

Mixed Disc #2: Nothing But Flowers

Nothing But Flowers...10/2001
front cover

Days after Chelo received her first disc, Victims of Geography, she received a bouquet of flowers in the mail. Nothing But Flowers was the second mixed disc I made for her. I don't think it was the strongest tracklist of the lot, but when you don't know someone very well, musically speaking, you need to throw some feelers out there. Sometimes that means sacrificing your own taste to see what grabs her. This disc included some bands who wouldn't make many appearances in the collection because Chelo didn't like 'em and I didn't enjoy including 'em...like The Dead (besides, I think a magnolia is a tree, not a flower).

I went with a 60/40 split when I first started making discs for Chelo...about 60% of the disc was brand new to her, while I figured she knew the other 40%. I'm just kidding, I didn't plan it out to that extent, but I did figure she'd know some of the music and that would be good. It would show her we had some bands in common. No matter the audience, Talking Heads are always a safe bet, and "(Nothing But) Flowers" is one of Chelo's favorites. "Iris" was popular at the time and also had a beautiful message that would catch her attention, no doubt...a fox is a wolf who sends flowers ;->

I've given Chelo flowers and plants throughout the years, and they were all very pretty, but not very memorable. I just now found that out when she said, "You've never given me flowers...at least not in the past few years." Music is memorable and lasts forever. Nothing But Flowers is the nicest bouquet I ever gave her.

Check out the list of songs and click to see the videos when available (I love Nirvana's video for "In Bloom", and "Iris" live in an absolute downpour is magnificent). Then tell me, what would you put on the sequel? "Blue Orchid" from The White Stripes, perhaps...like the one I gave Chelo for Mothers' Day this year? I'd like to know. Put as many "flower" songs in the comments as you can for as the great Delta Burke once said, "If you want to say it with flowers, a single rose says, 'I'm cheap'."

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1. This Bouquet<><>Ani DiFranco
2. Sugar Magnolia<><>Grateful Dead
3. The Daisy<><>Calobo
4. Sunflowers<><>Everclear
5. In Bloom<><>Nirvana
6. Iris<><>Goo Goo Dolls
7. Lilies Of The Valley<><>David Byrne
8. Flowers<><>Camper Van Beethoven
9. The Garden<><>P.J. Harvey
10. Wild Flower<><>The Cult
11. Garden<><>Pearl Jam
12. (Nothing But) Flowers<><>Talking Heads
13. Flower<><>Liz Phair
14. Bed Of Roses<><>Screaming Trees
15. All The Dirt<><>Mike Doughty
16. Flowers In My Heart<><>Sixteen Horsepower
17. Pictures Of Lily<><>The Who
18. New Rose<><>The Damned
19. Blue Flower<><>Mazzy Star
20. Rose Parade<><>Elliott Smith
21. (hidden track) Garden Party<><>Rick Nelson

Introduction and Mixed Disc #1: Victims Of Geography

Every guy thought that his barrage of mixed tapes would be the piece de resistance of his current courtship. There was no convenience factor when putting together a mixed tape. Recording a mixed tape was a lengthy process (if you did it right...c'mon now!). You thought, "There's no way that she won't appreciate this tremendous effort...She'll be mine for life!" Well the truth is it was a labor of love and no one appreciated the mixed tape as much as its creator.

Of course, now we're talking about burned CDs (or perhaps even just moving songs from her iTunes library into a "new playlist"), but a simple file transfer, in itself, doesn't quite have the same romantic essence as the mixed tape. It's the difference between a handwritten letter and an email...miles apart on the spectrum of passion. I know...I've created my share of mixes in the past 25 years. One of my very first mixed tapes went to future author Tara McCarthy. It even found its way into her 1998 book Been There, Haven't Done That: A Virgin's Memoir, a narrative sprung from Tara's journals about one hapless boyfriend after another on her search for love. Here I sit..."Ian Haviland"...early hapless boyfriend from the high school years. However, she was kind enough to me in the book...thank you Tara.

But I'm here to talk about my final mixed tape recipient, my wife. I've thrown her under the bus a few times in my writing; even the blog title is a reference to one of her favorite sayings. The truth is that Chelo loves good music as much as me. However, for her (and probably most people), music needs to fit the mood...there's certain music for dinner, certain music for dancing, certain music for downtime, and, often, silence is golden. I, on the other hand, can listen to anything at anytime. I can bang my head to Sigur Ros or fall asleep to Sigue Sigue Sputnik.

Victims of Geography...10/2001
front cover

When Chelo and I began dating we lived 1,500 miles apart. We would talk often and visit about once a month. Also about once a month, a mixed CD left Oregon and made its way to Flagstaff, Arizona, and I'm sure that it was these slices of audible art that solidified my place inside her heart.  The first CD was titled Victims Of Geography...a phrase which I pulled from a Billy Bragg song called "The Only One"...chosen for our inconvenient living arrangements. Now, I said that burned CDs don't carry the same weight as a good ol' mixed tape, but that is not necessarily the case if you do it right. I thought I'd take a look at those discs again to remind me how wonderful my wife is and also...how to make a killer 80 minute collection of music!

There needs to be a common thread throughout the disc. Ridiculous are those who slap eighteen or so unrelated songs together and call it good. "She likes those songs," you say...well then she probably has them already, onionhead. It's ok to give her a song or two that she already owns as long as they fit within the context of the art. Then, she'll hear those songs a bit differently forever more. The song selections on Chelo's collections are most often related by title. It's a rare occasion that songs with similar messages are the priority.

Click to enlarge

On Victims Of Geography, each song title includes a geographical place name. This disc was created way back in October of 2001, so we could come up with tons of songs that might've made the cut since that time. I'd like that. What songs would you put on the sequel? Read through the track list...click on song titles to see videos when available...finally, add a song or two of your own that fits the theme in the comment section.

1. Welcome To This World<><>Primus
2. Mexico<><>Cake
3. London Rain<><>Heather Nova
4. Santa Monica<><>Everclear
5. Tennessee<><>Arrested Development
6. Shiloh Town<><>Mark Lanegan
7. The Girl From Ipanema<><>Pizzicato Five
8. U-Mass<><>Pixies
9. Livin' On The Edge (Of Houston)<><>The Reverend Horton Heat
10. Singapore<><>Tom Waits
11. Arizona Sky<><>China Crisis
12. A New England<><>Billy Bragg
13. Is Chicago, Is Not Chicago<><>Soul Coughing
14. Brasilia Crossed With Trenton<><>Bob Mould
15. Radio Free Europe<><>R.E.M.
16. Seattle<><>Public Image Limited
17. LA<><>Elliott Smith
18. Madagascar<><>Brenda Kahn
19. Norwegian Wood<><>The Beatles
20. New Amsterdam<><>Elvis Costello
21. She Went To Germany<><>Violent Femmes
22. Port Angeles<><>Flop
23. Donegal Express<><>Shane MacGowan & The Popes


Previewing this post, Chelo smiled. It made her want to revisit the disc. The power of a great collection of music is never ending...at least, so says the creator.